moving.on

Breaking up with someone you love is hard. Seeing that someone you love moving on and dating someone is harder. "I'm seeing someone right now" feels like millions of slaps on the face. Somehow it's ridiculously absurd that I should feel this way, hurtfully devastated, especially when I broke up with him for over 4 years already. Not to mention the fact that I have been with my current boyfriend for almost 3 years now. And I happen to know that he has had many girls. He just didn't break the news to me like this time.

Our relationship was complex. He couldn't even be considered as a boyfriend material yet there is something about him that I can't seem to get over. Something that keeps me coming back for more. I know I'm desperate. The act of emotional unfaithfulness is grave and selfish. Even though I feel considerably guilty that deep in my heart I still have a very tiny teeny weeny little feeling for this guy, I can't help myself from thinking about him and the past we once shared. Oh my gosh, I'm such a bad person.

I don't think it's because he's Swedish too though.